“He had a tattoo on his arm.”
Wow. That tells us a lot. Or not.
What if we phrase it like this:
“. . . the big eye rippled on his arm, never blinking, only staring.”
The first one gives us information: A man has a tattoo on his arm. Basic. Factual. Interesting? No.
- The second one creates a picture in our minds. When you read the background surrounding this sentence, you get the full picture. A little girl is in a room with a scary man who has a scarier tattoo. That tattoo will stay with you as you progress through the book because of a skeletal vision fleshed out.
One shows us a skeleton; the other puts a little flesh on those meager bones.
When I began writing the novel, The Redemption of Caralynne Hayman, I knew I wanted a tattoo to be a part of the religious cult so I searched. Internet showed me hundreds of possibilities. Butterflies and roses automatically conjure up the feeling of love, peace, or happiness. I needed one to heighten the cult importance, one that could have a touch of religious symbolism, that could portray a sinister feeling, but also be appropriate for both male and female. I finally settled on an “eye.”
- It could be larger to fit on a man’s upper arm. It could be tiny to fit on a woman’s wrist.
- The symbolism of an eye can be linked to “God’s eternal eye watching,” hence the religious “feeling.”
- To the little girl who opens chapter one, a silent, all-seeing, never blinking tattooed eye frightens her and permanently marks her life.
What do we have? A fully fleshed image. No bones showing in this picture.
What research have you done that you’ve “fleshed” into a full fledged picture? Do you have one you wished you’d worked on a little more?
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Besides being a member and active participant of many writing groups, Carole Brown enjoys mentoring beginning writers. She loves to weave suspense and tough topics into her books, along with a touch of romance and whimsy, and is always on the lookout for outstanding titles and catchy ideas. She and her husband reside in SE Ohio but have ministered and counseled nationally and internationally. Together, they enjoy their grandsons, traveling, gardening, good food, the simple life, and did she mention their grandsons?
Connect with her at: https://www.facebook.com/CaroleBrown.author
Check out her books at: http://www.amazon.com/Carole-Brown/e/B00EZV4RFY/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1427898838&sr=8-1
Robin E. Mason says
I love doing my research! some recent finds: Braxton Hicks contractions were so named [by a British doctor named Braxton Hicks] in 1872, and therefore usable for my story set in 1910; I’ve a character who makes quilts by hand [same story, earlier years] and I did a good deal of research for patterns and trends at that time. simple things, like street names instead of “down the street” and names of musical classics vs “she played well” etc etc etc